i confess

i don't think i can commit. i don't think i'll ever be able to fully give all of myself to someone again. i just don't think i'm capable, of giving in and becoming one with another person. i just have a habit of slowly destroying the relationship or pushing away before it ever gets serious. it never fails, i meet a guy, we have the greatest sex i've ever had, and we repeat this for a few weeks. i start catching feelings, i hope it turns into more, and when we reach a happy medium and things become less about to sex and more about getting to know one another i start pushing away. i try to find someone new to bring into the equation. and the cycle repeats itself. i don't think i'm the marrying type. and i'd be a terrible boyfriend. which is funny, because all i want is to submit.